The Rant - Do women need fruit to drink beer? No!

Woman Law: Don’t put fruit in or on my glass of beer.

It’s unnecessary. It’s distracting. Yet sadly, gals are swooning for a taste as if George Clooney himself had poured it. Case in point: This summer, I saw women — Clevelanders, not Madison Avenue socialites — drinking beer in glasses trimmed with fruit salad ... beforea
baseball game.

Pouring a handful of blueberries into a pint glass is the new West Sixth and East Fourth way to seem cool. It’s designed to please the martini crowd, and it’s popping up in brewpubs throughout the country. The Miller High Life guy would surely find it an affront to beer-drinkers and fruit-lovers everywhere. A beer-and-strawberry cocktail?Please.

The problem with this attempt at sophistication is that beer is not supposed to be trendy. It’s one of the simple things in life. When did people start assuming women are too dainty to throw back a Dortmunder Gold?

I’m not against the occasional pumpkin-flavored brew, hints of raspberry or the requisite orange slice atop a draft pour of Blue Moon. I’ve got a crush on Sam Adams — I’ll even give in to his Cherry Wheat on sunny summer days. Fruit infusions are OK, too — when the berry is part of a well-constructed recipe brewed alongside hops and barley. But don’t hand me a pint that was stocked with half the produce aisle before the beer hit the glass.

Here’s the bottom line: Being a woman and savoring a classic brewski are not mutually exclusive. I enjoy being a woman. I am a sucker for Meg Ryan movies. I have a closet full of shoes, half of them black high heels. But I’m not waiting on Rhett Butler, and I don’t need a slice of watermelon attached to the glass to make my beer palatable.

So give us ladies a little more credit. Give me a beer — a plain old cold beer in a tall glass. No fringe, no fuss, no fruit.
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