The old version of herself would have been frightened.
Claudine Grunenwald Kirschner had thought she was hiking 32 miles over two days. It was to be the last stretch in her yearlong quest to trek all the trails in the Cuyahoga Valley National Park, a journey she’d decided to take in celebration of her 45th birthday.
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“It was an idea that was just crazy enough,” she says with her easy laugh.
In reality, that final hike turned out to be 46 miles. She was alone on the trail as night came, determined to finish before midnight brought her 46th birthday. The pain in her legs and feet was almost unbearable, but her spirit soared.
“It never occurred to me to be afraid,” Kirschner says. “I became less afraid of the dark as the year went on, but also less afraid of myself.”
The mother of four didn’t have any flash revelations during her 280 miles on the trail. Rather, her confidence grew steadily with each mile.
Today, while walking a stretch of Pine Grove Trail near Ritchie Ledges, she says afraid at least a half dozen times, but always to describe what she’s not anymore.She is not afraid to face what she’s most afraid of, not afraid to look at her own life, not afraid to go after what she wants with unapologetic enthusiasm, not afraid to say her work benefits people and, finally, not afraid to go after her truest passion — her work with women.
The Brecksville resident has always worked in leadership training. Seven years ago, she launched Vibrant Living & Leadership. Now, she’s teamed up with the Conservancy for Cuyahoga Valley National Park to offer a series of weekend retreats called Women in the Wild, including one Feb. 2-4. Participants paint, hike, journal, rest, dream, eat chef-prepared food and discuss life by the fireplace.
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“Understanding yourself makes you a better leader and a better human,” Kirschner explains. “We’re trying to get to that authentic voice.”
She’s the first to admit it’s a process. About half of her miles were logged with friends or family. When she was alone, she made a point of embracing the silence and whatever thoughts came along. She realized early on that her project would be harder than she expected, both mentally and physically.
She recalls one hike in particular that turned bad for no particular reason.
“Less than a mile in, I was feeling sluggish,” she says. “The message in my mind was Who do you think you are doing this? Almost immediately, it was replaced with Who do you think you are not to do this?”
But it was that last hike of 46 miles that was the most challenging. She was in excruciating pain and only had a few hours left before her birthday. Still, there was really only one possible outcome — finishing before she turned 46.
“You just do it,” she says. “We all get this one life. Are we going to be doing what we love?”
Find Your Place in the Wild
Claudine Grunenwald Kirschner offers this advice for those on their own journey.
“I gave myself time and space for a year. You have to give yourself time to be reflective. But be prepared that it might reveal something.”
“Be open to people. In this life, we are connected to one another, and it is our responsibility to show up for each other.”
“Get out in the natural world. There’s certainly lots of science behind having an experience outside in fresh air among trees, among something real."
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