The first thing you need to know about racing hermit crabs at Around the Corner is that your crab doesn’t matter. Speaking from experience, there’s no way to tell a winner.
I know because I've never won.
No, despite being tasked with celebrating the joys of hermit crab racing, I've experienced nothing but misery at the table.
That futility doesn’t come from a lack of trying, however. For two years, I’ve spent more Saturdays than I’d like to admit leaned over a table, screaming vitriol at some poor crustacean that is only moving because it is hot and disorientated.
The rules are simple. Belly up to the table and throw down a dollar. No dollar, no crab. After everyone selects their racers (NO TOUCHING THE CRABS), the animals are trapped by an upside-down bowl and placed under a lamp (which royally pisses them off) before being let loose. Whoever's crab reaches the table’s exterior first wins the round’s buy-ins.
While I’ve come close more times than I can count by picking the crab with the coolest drawing on its shell, I’ve never gotten the glory of that $13 pot. Maybe that’ll change this weekend. 18616 Detroit Ave., Lakewood, 216-521-4413, atccafe.com